Manitoba Weather Report and General Highway Conditions

Ground Hogs Day was a bit a disappointment this year.

Punxsutawney Phil--saw his shadow...6 more weeks of winter
Dunkirk Dave--did not see his shadow...an early spring
PeeWee--saw his shadow...6 more weeks of winter
Wiarton Willie--did not see his shadow...an early spring
General Beauregard Lee--did not see his shadow...an early spring
Jimmy the Groundhog--did not see his shadow...an early spring
Shubenacadie Sam --did not see his shadow...an early spring

From these predictions we can conclude that Dunkirk Dave and Wiarton Willie are bold faced liars. General Beauregard Lee, Jimmy the Groundhog and Shubenacadie Sam and just stupid. PeeWee saw the extra six weeks of spring coming but is a little shortsighted and didn't see these last two. Punxsaawney Phil knew exactly what we were in for but knew that most of us couldn't stand the idea of being responsible for my suicide so only warned us about the extra six weeks.

Today is March 29, 2008. Spring has been upon us for 1 week now. I'm am watching a severe storm dump another snowfall on me. They (those miserables S.O.B.'s at Environment Canada) are predicting up to 30 centimeters. The Commoner tried to cheer me up with the comment "that's only another foot."

Now I realize that no place on earth is perfect but come on. Nassau's average temp is 82. Las Vegas boasts an average of 67. Phoenix 72.6. Daytona Beach 70.4. Yuma is 74.2. Yes, there are cloudy days but you can't get stuck in clouds. Yes, it rains but you don't need to shovel rain.

I now know how prisoners of the former Soviet Union felt when exiled to Siberia (average temperature is 32).

I have minimized the requirements in my search for prince charming. He no longer needs ride a white horse or slay dragons. All that is required is a modest home in a warm climate.

Oh and as for the Highway Conditions - snow packed - travel not recommended but surely desired.

Stuff I Don't Know

My fan base (you both know who you are) was very supportive when I returned to blogging. Someone I respect very much encouraged me to blog regularly. So my goal was for every second day. So naturally, I felt I should write about stuff I know.
There's not much. But there is no end to the stuff I don't know.

1. Why is there always a parking spot on the opposite side of street?
2. Why does produce in the grocery store beg to be taken home and refuse to be used once it's in your fridge?
3. Why do you have a really good hair day just before your hair appointment?
4. Why is there nothing to watch on T.V. when you have a satellite dish?
5. Why can I read 40 pages of a book before I've already read it?
6. Why do other people have advise for my life but can't seem to deal with their own?
7. Why do I have pimples and wrinkles at the same time? Does it mean middle age?
8. Why does every magazine promise me significant weight loss and new dessert recipes on the cover?
9. Why do I buy them anyway?
10. Why does time go so fast when you're sleeping?
11. Why do I babble?

I will search for something to blog about. Thanks for bearing with me.

I Could Tell It Was Monday When....

I woke up later than usual. It shouldn't matter since I don't need to be at work till noon. But my morning routine of coffee in the hot tub was changed due to a severe north wind, 3 inches of new snow and the fact the Ellen would be on in only 1/2an hour. That meant I had to rush through my shower, scarf down my breakfast and skip doing my makeup (the teenagers I work with won't notice). I settled down for my chat with the girls from the View and while I know they can't hear me, I feel we have a certain rapport just the same.

I went to warm up the car. I pressed the command start button. Nothing. Kept trying -only 14 more times then realized the car battery was dead. I have a booster pack in the trunk of my car. However, the one key I have for the car doesn't fit into the trunk. Odd. Without the battery, the manual trunk button doesn't work. Also, the remote starter should open the trunk but it too, needs power.

Finally got the booster pack out of my son's car, started mine, missed the last 10 minutes of The View and was on my way. The 3 inches of snow on my deck was 5 inches on the highway. The tracks made by bigger trucks were tricky to follow since I was blinded by the snow. Only had 2 near misses with the ditch and one with a really big truck. I made it to work. Oh happy day.

Now the day holds more challenges - will my car start? are the roads going to be passable? will there be any Easter Dinner leftovers? will anyone read this and care?

Tomorrow will be a better day. If not, heads will roll.

Queen For 10 Tens

I escaped from my icy prison to take my rightful place as queen. Early one morning, I fooled the commoner into driving me to the airport. I told him I was picking up a package. When his back was turned I boarded the first available flight, not knowing my destintation, but assured that wherever it took me would be better than living in exile.

The flight was destined for Rakjavik, but the handsome pilot winked at me and slyly turned the plane south. He landed in Nassau and slipped me his phone number.

The paparazzi were, as usual, one step ahead of me. They had alerted the islanders. One frienldy looking man stood out in the crowd and since he was the only one strong enough to carry my luggage, I went home with him.

We drove up to the mansion and that's when I knew - I WAS HOME! My island paradise had a pool, jesters for my entertainment and not one, but two, live in staff.

But being royalty is not always easy. To escape my duties we travelled to another island but my followers kept me so busy I was soon exhausted. We left Abaco so that I could return to my rightful throne.

I spent 10 blissful days being treated royally. But alas, when the threat to my personal safety became too great I was forced to, once again, board a flight to an undisclosed location.

The plane was taken over by terrorists and forced to land back in the land of ice and snow. After wondering the airport for days, the commoner spotted me and carried me back to the prison he calls home. I will put on a brave face and bide my time, for surely, when he's not looking - I WILL ESCAPE AGAIN! YOU CANNOT HOLD ME HERE AGAINST MY WILL! I WILL BE FREE! FREEDOM! FREEDOM! FREEDOM