Golfing Rules

Apparantly, each golf course has it's own specific rules. How planted trees or out of bound balls are scored, that sort of thing. These are some that are Roblin specific.

1. Members of the ladies league are required to think of 3 things to complain about prior to coming into the clubhouse.
2. Members of the men's league will not support the clubhouse but will instead bring there own liquor from home, consume in on the course and spend hours after their game being obnoxious to the staff.
3. Overweight members will insist on driving their golf carts right up to the green and ignore all cart paths.
4. Serious golfers will talk loudly during the oppositions shot. Same golfers will pout if you talk during theirs.
5. All members will expect membership fees and cart costs be kept to a minimum while at the same time demanding course improvements.
6. Members are allowed to spend 20 minutes minimum looking for lost balls in the bush or in the water even though they have not shot anywhere near these obstacles.
7. Members should deduct a minimum of 2 shots per hole including mulligans and gimmee's.
8. Members are invited to travel south to the oppositions new course and spread the joy elsewhere.

Weather Forecast

An inch and a half so far. The Golf Course is closed until further notice. The restaurant is open for lunch. The staff is getting cranky cause I keep cutting hours. I'm getting cranky cause I'm expected to be here. The only thing to do now is to find good things about the rain.

1. Don't need to water plants.
2. No point washing windows.
3. Gives people plenty to talk about at the post office.
4. Don't have to see some on our more annoying members.
5. Saving money on sunscreen.
6. Have the chance to wear my rain bonnet.
7. Got lots of time to blog.
8. You don't have to shovel rain.
9. Geese look like they're having fun.
10. Forest fire danger is low.

If you can think of good things about rain please comment. No seriously, if you can think of good things to say about this weather please call me with the name and number of your supplier.

NO NEWS

You know what they say... no news is good news. I must be in a good mood cause I have nothing to whine about today. Therefore no blog. If you want to see a new blog tomorrow, I suggest sending someone in to irritate me. Oh wait, tonight's Ladies Night. Should have something to write about tomorrow.

A BETTER DAY

Summer's a busy time for me. Working pretty much 7 days a week and anywhere from 8 to 12 hours a day, getting a good night's sleep is pretty important to me. So this morning when my phone rang at 1:33 a.m. so that someone could tell me how worried about me they were and that I'm working too hard, and shouldn't put up with this crap, yada, yada, yada, you can imagine I was feeling a little less than thrilled.

I was feeling the love but maybe they could let me know at they care in the afternoon.

So advice to those of you who love me - please don't call after midnight and before 7:00 a.m. Thank you for your consideration.

A New Record

Tuesday I was sure that my morning was as bad as it could get. The men's league schedule had to be redone for the 4th time. I had staff issues. I woke up with a headache. But a good friend offered to bring along a bottle of wine and we would head out to Grandma B's greenhouse (my happy place).

But nooooo. I was proven wrong. Never underestimate the universe. Sometimes it can really just crap all over your parade. I had another, more serious, staff issue so I was going to have to cancel my greenhouse expedition. Then the phone rang and I was needed in the emergency room in Yorkton for my aunt. Turns out she's fine. So as I was driving home I couldn't help but smile because I new that Wednesday was sure to be a better day.

WRONG!!!

So now I sit working on the 5th draft of the men's schedule. The staff I had scheduled for 9 is still MIA and it's 10:08. Woke up with another headache. This is my day off but I've already worked 2 hours, still need to do a financial statement for a board meeting tonight. Yep, living the dream.

I've watched "The Secret". But apparently all I'm attracting is the crap that everyone else didn't want. Sure would like a guarantee that tomorrow won't suck. Please forward any guarantees to me at your earliest convenience.

The Merits of Marriage

Yep, I complained about the commoner. But after serious consideration I took stock and realized that there's amazing advantages to be married.

My darling is, as we speak, fixing the septic pump for the golf course. This is one of the many services he provides at no cost. He's also that handy at home. He cooks, he cleans, does home repairs, car repairs, shops, landscapes, listens to my whining, pretends not to be horrified by my just-out-of-bed appearance, empties mouse traps, doesn't question my money management skills, listens to me babble, drives all the way when I'm too tired, rubs my feet, laughs at my jokes. The list is endless. So even though he farts in front of me I know I've got it good. Just promise you won't tell him. I'd hate to give up my advantage.

The Virtues of Dating

Girls, remember when you first started dating your sweetheart? How you would never be caught dead without shaving your legs, full face makeup (somewhat Geisha-like). You were always sweet and charming - perhaps a little coy?

A your darling in turn - always smelled good. Was always freshly shaved. A little sweetie who whispered sweet nothings and brought flowers. And would never, ever fart in from of you.
And then you marry. A while marriage is a fine institute for those of us who need to be institutionalized, there is much to be said for dating.

Wouldn't it be nice to go back to the dating days. When you were taken out for dinner at night since you had worked so hard and might be tired. Maybe a movie, perhaps even one you might like as opposed to the car chasing, skinny chick, kick-boxing crap that somebody else might like. Compliments flowed like wine. Gifts for no special occasion. Yes, girls, those were the good old days.

But it's interesting, that even when marriages break up and you can no longer live happily ever after, that most women will dive right back in and marry again. So my dear friends, I am not telling you to end your marriage but perhaps if it does end you should consider the virtues of dating. Find a great guy and date him till death do you part.

Living the Dream

Another day of making 50 pounds of ground beef into patties. Mixing a batch of marinade for 80 steaks. Scheduling league play for the golf course. Ordering liquor, groceries, supplies. Sitting at my computer wondering what it's going to take for me to get the hell out of the jobs that I don't like and do what I really want.

Could it be fear? Perhaps some insecurity from my youth? Perhaps the apprehension of being ridiculed for my attempts. Or knowing that total failure would crush my dreams forever.

All my life I've known what I've really wanted to do. I can picture it in my mind so clearly. I can hear the noises associated with it. So badly do I want it that I can practically taste it. But 30 years of trying to earn a living has put my into a routine that I can't escape. Most days I know that only I can make the changes necessary to pursue my dream. I know this in my brain and feel it in my heart but the fear has settled in my bowels and it is clear to me that it is this organ that rules my life.

So please send out positive thoughts to the universe and also send comments on my page. Perhaps with your help I will take the plunge and live the dream of being a Rockette.

The light of day

Well, I've had a chance to sleep on it. Still cranky. But after some consideration I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt and admit that perhaps the kitchen did not earn 87% of the profits. It may have been less. But you know how we princesses get when we've been wronged. Like the time somebody stole my tiara. People will pay. When I assume my place on the throne - heads will role. Consider this fair warning if you intend to do me wrong.